“I got no money in my pocket, I got a hole in my jeans, I had a job and I lost it…”

This Keith Urban song came on the radio as I was driving home from work tonight.  Fittingly, since I got laid off today.  It sucks but  surprisingly, I’m not as upset as I thought I would be.

Losing this job feels kinda like breaking up with someone you didn’t ever want to marry.  Unpleasant, but I knew it would happen eventually.   The “it isn’t you, it’s [the company]” speech still made me slightly nauseous.  But as much as I will miss some of my coworkers and my paychecks, I didn’t LOVE this job.   Ultimately, I know I could be a lot happier somewhere else, doing something I’m really passionate about.  The hardest part is the process of getting back out there,  into the dark, scary singles job market, hoping that something great will come along and that I won’t have to settle again.  (Just like dating – ha!)

I know that I’m fortunate.  Unlike many in the ranks of the unemployed that I’m joining, I don’t have a family to support or a mortgage to pay.  I can remain on my parents’ health insurance plan for almost two more years.  I trusted my gut and didn’t sign a year apartment lease, but managed a short-term one just though December.  So I’ve got some time to get my life in order before moving on in 2010.

This will be a year of big changes – I can just feel it, and this is just the beginning.

“…but it won’t get to me… I’m alive and I’m free, who wouldn’t wanna be me?”